


Suffering In Silence

by Colleen17



Category: Bonanza
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, Brothers, Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-25
Updated: 2013-05-25
Packaged: 2017-12-12 23:47:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 18,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/817459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colleen17/pseuds/Colleen17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the added responsibilities of running the ranch, they didn't notice that their little brother was withdrawing further and further from them each day.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Suffering In Silence

This story is set after The Magnificent Adah continuing on after Ben, Adam and Hoss leave the saloon. Ben says "Come on, let's go see Little Joe."

Little Joe sat at the table, listening to his brothers discuss the various tasks that needed to be done around the ranch. He pushed his eggs around his plate, barely eating enough to keep an eighteen year old alive. He wondered where he would be working today, hoping that his brother's would assign him to chores around the house. Somehow staying close to his Pa helped him cope with the growing fears within him.

Adam and Hoss knew the next few weeks were not going to be easy. Without their father's help they would have to rely on the experienced hands to keep the ranch going. With the added responsibilities of running the ranch, they didn't notice that their little brother was withdrawing further and further from them each day.

Three weeks earlier...

Ben, Hoss and Adam walked through the saloon swinging doors satisfied with themselves. They had punished the man who had badly beaten Little Joe; almost blinding the boy. "Let's go see Little Joe." Ben said to his sons as they walked over to the International House.

They found the doctor leaning over Joe, who was still lying on the settee, cleaning his face. The bruising was making a spectacular appearance and his left eye was almost closed due to the swelling.

Ben knelt down next to his youngest son. "Can we take him home?" Ben asked the doctor as he stared at his son's face.

"You can, but I wouldn't recommend riding." The doctor told Ben as he cleared away the basin of bloody water and used bandages. "Keep him quiet for the next two days...Make sure he drinks plenty of water and soup...nothing solid for a while till the swelling goes down."

"I'll hire a buggy from the livery stable," Adam told his father and left the hotel.

"You'll need to keep him warm and as still as possible." The doctor recommended. He snapped his bag shut "I'll come out and see him tomorrow," he told Ben and also left the hotel.

Joe's face hurt and his head felt like it was going to explode. He could hear his Pa and Hoss talking softly; at least he thought they were talking softly. It was hard to tell since his ears were buzzing. He tried to open his eyes but only his right eye partially opened. Everything was blurry but he could make out his father's grey hair through the haze. He thought he heard Adam's voice and flinched when a large figure bent over him and picked him up.

"Buggy's all set!" Adam told his family as he entered the International House. His brother Hoss lent over Little Joe and picked him up. He felt his little brother flinch, and froze.

Ben having seen his son flinch also placed his hand on his son's chest, "We're just going to take you home to the Ponderosa son." Ben told Little Joe as Hoss cradled his little brother in his arms. Ben looked on in concern at the still figure whose face was hardly recognisable due to the swelling and bruising. Adam picked up the blankets that the hotel had given them for the ride home. They said their goodbyes and made their way out of the hotel.

The cool night air made Little Joe shiver. His face sent sharp stabbing pain down his neck. Tears fell silently in the darkness leaving pink trails down his cheeks. He felt himself lifted higher and then placed on a seat next to the familiar bay rum scent of his father. A blanket was placed over him; the warmth and security of his father allowed him to relax and drift off to sleep.

Joe woke up with a start, dreaming of a fist constantly pounding into his face. He couldn't open his eyes and his head was throbbing in time to his heartbeat. Moving his mouth even hurt. It took him a few minutes to get his thoughts together and to remember what had happened to him. He remembered what the tall man had said to him before he continually hit his face. 'My name is Reagon...John C Reagon...Remember that when your Pa asks?' Joe heard movement around him and he flinched, not knowing where he was.

"Little Joe, can you hear me?" Ben called softly to his son and watched closely for movement. He grabbed with both hands his son's rising hand, as if searching for him.

Joe heard his Pa call him and raised his hand up searching for his Pa. His father took hold of his hand and held it tightly between both of his large hands. The security of his Pa holding him gave him respite from his uncertainties. He couldn't move his mouth so he squeezed his Pa's hand to let him know he was aware of him.

"I have some warm broth, son...You need to drink some to keep up your strength." Ben told his son as he gently raised Joe's head and put the cup to his lips.

Joe tried to part his lips and felt the warm liquid pass through and swallowed. It hurt to move his face so he kept his expression featureless. His face felt so swollen that he doubted anyone could see an expression even if he tried. After drinking the broth, the warmth in his stomach helped him drift off to sleep. He had no idea what time of the day or night it was but since he couldn't see or talk he thought that sleep was the best thing to do.

Two days later Joe was able to open his right eye and, although still blurry, he could at least see the images around him. He was able to speak and eat soft foods. The headaches were the worst he had suffered in his short life. During the day he was allowed to sit down on the settee in front of the fire and Ben fussed over him and kept him company. There wasn't much that Joe could do, reading was out of the question because he couldn't see that well. He found himself dozing and listening to the household noises.

Of a night Adam would read to him, enjoying broadening his little brother's mind. Joe listened to Adam read; his rich expressive voice was soothing. He was always disappointed when Adam would finish but knew that his brother needed to sleep. Dozing through the day made it hard for Joe to sleep at night and the nightmares of a fist pounding his face woke him up constantly throughout the night. The persistent headaches also made it hard for him to get a deep restful sleep.

It wasn't long before everyone noticed the dark circles forming under Joe's eyes and that he was losing weight. Ben worried about his youngest son who seemed to jump at the slightest loud noise and was also noticeably avoiding his brother Hoss.

Two weeks later Joe was standing by the coral talking to his beloved horse when Hoss jokingly crept up behind him and suddenly picked him up in a bear hug. Joe's reaction was immediate; he kicked his brother in the shin and elbowed him as hard as he could. Hoss dropped him and grabbed his leg. Joe ran to the house not looking back. If he had looked back, Hoss would have seen the terror in his brother's eyes.

When Hoss recovered he walked into the house calling his brother's name. Ben was standing at the bottom of the stairs looking up. He turned around when Hoss came in calling. "What in tarnation did you do to your brother?" he asked his middle son angrily.

"What did I do? All I did was picked him up in a bear hug and he kicked me!" Hoss told his father grimacing as he rubbed his shin. Ben frowned and looked back up the stairs as if waiting for Joe to make an appearance and apologise to his brother.

He turned back and looked at Hoss "Maybe you hugged him too hard!" Ben said frowning, not understanding Joe's behaviour lately.

"Pa all I did was come up behind him and lift him off the ground...Dadburnit...I've done it a hundred times." Hoss said. Ben frowned in answer to his son's statement.

"Well I suggest we let him be and just let him calm down...then we'll talk to him." Ben told his son and placed his hand on his shoulder.

"I hope so Pa cause all he does is avoid me...and I don't know why!" Hoss told his Pa despairingly. He missed his little brother.

"I think we need to just give him time Hoss. That beating he took really hurt him... just give him time...Soon he'll be back to himself again" he slapped his son's back trying to reassure him. Ben suspected that Hoss's size was what Joe was afraid of, not his brother himself. He decided to go into town and see the doctor and talk to him about it.

The boys were sitting in their usual places in front of the fire when there was a loud knock on the door. Adam got up and answered it and was surprised to see the sheriff standing in the doorway. "Adam...It's your Pa...There was an accident and your Pa and a another couple were hit by a runaway wagon...You need to come into town...Doc's with him," the sheriff told him with the hint of urgency in his voice. The three sons grabbed their hats and walked out of the house. Joe held back, he hadn't been in town since the beating. He didn't want to go into town but he wanted to see his Pa. He slowly walked towards the barn; his heart was racing and one of his headaches began to make itself known.

Adam could see his little brother's hesitation and called "Joe! You stay here and we'll bring Pa home. If he's real bad, one of us will come back for you." Joe nodded his eyes thanking his perceptive brother, although he did feel foolish feeling this way. Adam, Hoss and the sheriff rode out leaving Joe alone in the yard. He walked back into the house and without even thinking he was standing in his father's bedroom. He was scared that he may never see his Pa again and sat down on his bed. It wasn't long before he drifted off to sleep.

The loud bang of the front door opening startled Joe awake. It took him a few seconds to realise where he was. He ran down stairs only to see his brothers carrying his Pa into the downstairs bedroom. Both his legs were bandaged and his left arm was in a sling. He had a bandage on his head. Joe walked into the bedroom, joining his brothers tentatively. He looked at Adam for reassurance.

"Pa's legs are broken, his shoulder's sprained and his got a bad bang on the head...He'll be alright...but it will be a while before he's up and around again." Adam told his little brother who looked at his Pa in horror. Adam put his arm around Joe's shoulders, noting the thinness, "Joe he's going to be ok...he just needs to rest...the doctor gave him something to make him sleep so why don't you head off to bed...I'll take first shift and you can take over from me around midnight."

Joe looked up at his brother; he chewed his bottom lip and nodded agreeing with his brother's instructions. "Goodnight Adam...Hoss." He walked over to the side of the bed and looked at his father's face, "Goodnight Pa." Joe said softly not wanting to wake his father.

Joe took over at midnight and Hoss took over from Joe at sunrise. Joe didn't go back to bed he helped Hop Sing in the kitchen. During breakfast Adam passed out their chores. Joe was given the cleaning of the stalls in the barn and round up some strays in the south pasture. He was busy cleaning the stalls when one of the older hands approached him.

"Hurry up there if you're goin' to join us out in the south pasture."

Joe turned around and frowned at the hand. "I'll be there...I just have to finish this first," he told the hand. Joe never liked him but he had been working at the Ponderosa for some years. He was a big man and had a scar over left ear to his chin.

"See that you do...your brothers might put up with you...but I ain't so I suggest you hurry up!"

"My brothers don't put up with me...I work just as hard as they do!" Joe told the hand, his temper rising. The hand took a step forward and Joe flinched. He stepped back into the stall and looked for a way out.

The hand grabbed the front of Joe's shirt "Listen hear...Your brothers put up with you for your Pa's sake...All us hands know how they really feel...we hear them talking saying how you're lazy and try to get out of chores all the time. If it wasn't for Hoss covering for you by finishing your chores all the time your Pa would have tanned your hide by now...but he won't be around for awhile so listen up...us hands won't be covering your laziness so get working or you'll find yourself at the end of this fist!" Joe went pale and felt his legs start to shake when the hand put his fist close to his face.

"Ok" Joe said in a small voice, staring at the fist next to his face.

"Good see that you do!" The hand left the barn.

Joe tried to calm himself down and hurried to finish the stalls. Five hands would be going out to the south pasture and he didn't want to be on the wrong side of any of them. He skipped lunch and headed for the south pasture as soon as he finished the stalls.

Adam frowned at Hoss as they sat at the table to eat lunch. "Where's Little Joe?"

"I don't rightly know Adam...He finished the stalls...must have gone straight out to the south pasture." Hoss told his brother as he tucked into some fried chicken.

"He doesn't eat enough." Adam stated remembering how thin Joe's shoulders were.

"He's right puny if you ask me?" Hoss declared.

"Well we'll make sure he eats his supper tonight...I don't want him sick too." Adam told his brother.

Joe approached the hands slowly and asked them where they had already searched this morning and how many were still missing. The hands looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders. The older hand from the barn spoke up, "We're missing ten head...over there and there needs searching." He told Joe. Joe looked around and chose the furthest away to search. He wanted to get as far away as possible from the hands. Everyone went their way and Joe found himself alone. He looked in all the usual hiding places and finally found a couple of steers and led them back to the herd.

Joe looked around; the hands were nowhere to be seen. He headed back to the area he had been searching and found another steer. He led him back to the herd and still couldn't see the hands. After searching the whole area he made his way back to the herd. The hands were sitting by a camp fire having a cup of coffee.

"How many did you find...I found three?" He told the hands.

"We found the rest of them...You head on back...wouldn't want to miss supper in that big house of yours," one of the hands said. "Three steers...call that putting in a hard day's work..." The hands shook their heads and laughed loudly as Joe made his way back to the house.

'Would Adam think he was lazy?' he wondered. When he got back he rubbed Cochise down and took Sport and Chubb in and did the same for them. It was still too early for supper so Joe decided to chop some kindling for Hop Sing. He took the load into the kitchen through the back door. Hop Sing was grateful and told him to wash up because supper was nearly ready.

"Hop Sing?"

"Yes Little Joe"

Joe was going to ask his friend if he thought he was lazy but worried that it was true, he changed his mind. "It doesn't matter...I'll go wash up." He climbed the back stairs and heard Hop Sing talking Chinese in the kitchen.

Joe joined his brothers at the table. He greeted them and started to put food on his plate. Adam watched his brother and was happy to see him at least put a good serving of food on his plate.

"Did you find many strays?" He asked his little brother.

Joe chose carefully how he answered "I found three in the area I was searching...the hands found the rest in their areas." He told his brother hoping Adam would be happy with him.

"So the herds all together in the south pasture?"

"Yes Adam...the hands said there was ten strays and when I caught up with them in the end...they said we have them all." Joe told his brother. "How's Pa?" He hoped the change of subject would stop Adam's questions.

"He's in a lot of pain Joe...He's sleeping mostly...Best thing." Hoss told his little brother. Joe nodded acknowledging his brother but avoided eye contact. He knew his brother would never hurt him but he couldn't help feeling anxious around his large brother.

Joe only ate half his meal and went straight to the bedroom his Pa was in. He looked down at his Pa and was surprised how frail he looked. Gone was the strength that made Joe feel safe. Joe was almost afraid to touch his father but he put his hand on his fathers and was rewarded with a squeeze. He wished he could have told his Pa how much he needed him right now but instead said "Just rest Pa and get better."

Joe left the room feeling lost in his own home and very alone. He said goodnight to his brothers and walked up to his room. Adam watched his brother climb the staircase and thought that his brother was quiet because he was worried about his Pa.

Little Joe sat at the table, listening to his brothers discuss the various tasks that needed to be done around the ranch. He pushed his eggs around his plate, barely eating enough to keep an eighteen year old alive. He wondered where he would be working today, hoping that his brother's would assign him to chores around the house. Somehow staying close to his Pa helped him cope with the growing fears within him.

He had not slept well. Apart from having a headache he had dreamt of several fists hitting him in the face. The same dream had repeated itself throughout the night. Adam had not noticed the dark circles under his little brother's eyes. Hoss didn't notice that Joe ate next to nothing. The one person who would have seen all of this was asleep in another room unable to focus on anything but his injuries. Little Joe sat in silence vowing to do whatever his brothers asked him to do and more. He didn't realise that his strength was gradually being diminished from not eating and sleeping.


	2. Chapter 2

Joe had been assigned to checking fences. He was pleased that he would not have to deal with any of the hands. He loaded up his supplies and left without a word of complaint. Both Adam and Hoss were so focused on their chores that they didn't notice that Joe had not eaten much breakfast and that he had left without any food for lunch. Hop Sing came running out of the house with food parcels for the brothers.

"Where is Little Joe?" He asked looking concerned, he had noticed the boy's lack of appetite, but had thought it was because of the worry over his father's accident.

"He left a while ago." Adam told their cook.

"He no eat...he need food or he get sick!" Hop Sing told Adam accusingly. Adam felt a pang of guilt having forgotten to keep an eye on his little brother. He grimaced and knew that he needed to add to his long list of chores, to find Joe and give him his lunch.

He lent down from his horse and took the parcel from Hop Sing "I'll see to it that he gets this...AND!" He raised his hand to stop Hop Sing from interrupting "And that he eats it!" He told him and turned to leave. Hop Sing headed back to the kitchen speaking in Chinese; Adam could only guess what he was saying.

Adam rode out of the yard and headed for town to pick up a few supplies and the mail. From there he was heading to the south pasture to ask the hands, who had been keeping watch over the herd, to move the herd to another area, joining them up with another larger herd. The ranch was in the early stages of round up, Adam had decided to start things earlier this year since their Pa was laid up and would be for some time.

Joe made his way along the fence, fixing anything that looked remotely in need of fixing. He didn't want his brothers to feel that they couldn't trust him to do what was asked of him. His fearful thoughts were making him think he was doing something out of the ordinary, when in actual fact, he was doing what he normally did, and that was a hard day's work. He found himself sweating excessively, the exertion combined with the lack of food, making him feel light headed. He drank water hoping to stop the light headedness but felt the beginnings of another headache. 'That's all I need!' he thought, the persistent headaches were wearing him down.

Adam found the hands sitting around a campfire sipping coffee. He felt envious and irritated but knew the hands had some tough days coming up so refrained from showing them that he was annoyed with their idleness.

"I want you to move this herd, down to the eastern section to join up with the main herd." He ordered the hands, directing his order to the older hand that was in charge.

"No problem Adam! Will Joe be helping?" The older hand asked with a smirk on his face, "Or should I say joining us?"

"What do you mean by that?" Adam asked, his annoyance showing at the remark.

"Ooh it's just that yesterday you sent him to round up strays...but...well you know how it is with these young ones...they kind of lose track of time."

Adam sighed, "What are you trying to say Len?" Adam had wondered about Joe's answers to his questions over supper; he seemed nervous.

"Well he didn't do much Adam...I would have expected more from a kid his age, that's all?" He said with sincerity but was in fact masking the hatred he had for the youngest Cartwright. He had seen him grow up being given everything he wanted and the relationship he had with his father made him envious of the boy. His own childhood had been filled with hardship and cruelty from a drunken father.

"Yes well, Joe is worried like the rest of us about Pa and he is only just starting to get back into things after being laid up from that beating." Adam explained to Len and only did that out of courtesy to his father, since the hand was one that his father had hired many years ago.

Len nodded and felt the hatred surge inside him, the boy not only had a loving father but brothers who would do anything for him.

Adam left the hands and since it was getting near lunch he decided to catch up to Joe and have lunch with him. He rode along the fence and could see the repairs Joe had made; the newer wood and wire standing out amongst the weathered wood and rusty wire. Adam could see Joe in the distance digging, replacing a fence post he surmised.

"Joe!" he called not wanting to sneak up on him after the episode with Hoss. His little brother looked up and waved at him. Adam could see that he had been working hard, his shirt was soaked with sweat and his face was very red.

"Hey Adam!" Joe greeted his older brother quietly; there was no enthusiasm or exuberance that was normally exhibited by him Adam noticed and wondered if his brother had pushed himself too hard and was fatigued.

"Hey little brother...you've been working hard." He praised his younger brother hoping he would at least know how much he appreciated his efforts.

"Thanks!" Joe continued to dig not being able to fully accept Adam's praise, since he didn't feel worthy of it.

"I brought lunch!" Adam held up the parcel Hop Sing had given him. "I thought I'd have mine with you seeing I had to deliver this to you anyway." Adam got down from his horse and walked over to the nearest tree and sat down with both parcels. Joe followed his brother grabbing his canteen on the way.

Adam was pleased to see his brother eat. They ate in silence, a silence Adam found unsettling as his brother would always ask him questions whenever they were alone. He loved this about his younger brother. He would always challenge his mind with the most intriguing questions. Adam knew that his brother was highly intelligent and would think about things that often went by unnoticed by most people. He looked over at his brother and noticed that his face had returned to its normal colour but he did also notice the pain in his brother's eyes.

"Do you have another headache?" Adam asked his brother.

"Yes...it's not as bad as the one I had yesterday." He told his brother hoping to dispel the concern.

"Talking of yesterday...I didn't get a chance to ask. Where did you search for strays yesterday?" Adam asked his brother wanting to hear his side of the story.

Joe looked at his brother, taken by surprise with his question. "I searched the entire northeast corner. Why?" sounding defensive.

"Oh, I was just wondering, that's all. I like to know how much work the hands are doing unsupervised." Adam said matter-of-factly.

"Is that how you see me, a hand?" Joe was angry; he hadn't thought that his brother only considered him as just another worker on the ranch.

"That's not what I meant Joe!" Adam said exasperated with his brother's attitude. "I was talking to Len this morning and it was just something he said...I wanted to hear from you first...that's all."

Joe stood up; still angry "I've got work to do. Thanks for lunch Adam. I wouldn't want to hold you up."

Adam watched his brother walk back over to the hole he was digging before lunch. He sighed; as usual his conversation with his brother had ended badly. Joe's over sensitivity and his own lack of sensitivity meant that many conversations between the two of them ended poorly.

"I'll see you back at the house!" Adam called out to his brother. Joe waved to his brother but returned to working straight away.

Joe finished the line of fencing and returned to the house. He groomed his horse and began to chop some wood, a chore that was left to whoever had time. Joe knew he was guilty of leaving it for his brother Hoss more often than not, so decided to make sure that he did it from now on, to help his brothers.

"Good to see you working for a change and not sitting around in that big house of yours!" Len exclaimed and sat himself down within earshot of Joe.

Joe turned around annoyed with the way the hand had spoken to him, "Haven't you got work to do?" Joe asked him clearly annoyed.

"Nope all done. I'm just gonna' sit and relax til suppertime." Len told Joe disgust tainting his statement. Joe sighed and continued to chop the wood ignoring the eyes that were boring into his back. He started to feel light headed and his headache that had receded to a dull ache was back in full force.

Joe should have listened to his body and stopped, but he didn't want to give Len that satisfaction. It was some time later before he turned around and saw that Len was no longer around. He put down the axe and shakily walked towards the house. He made sure he walked all the way into the house before slumping against the wall. His legs were shaking and his head was pounding. He slowly walked up the staircase and went into his room where he washed his face and drank some water.

Joe pulled off his sweat soaked shirt and collapsed on his bed. He was asleep in seconds and that was how his brothers found him when they got home. Hop Sing had alerted them that their brother was asleep from exhaustion. He had watched the boy from the kitchen chop the wood like there was no tomorrow.

Hoss and Adam pulled off his boots and pants. They put his nightshirt on and tucked him into bed. Adam was not happy that Joe was missing a meal but knew that his brother needed to sleep. They quietly left the room and went downstairs.

Adam was sitting with his father reading when he heard footsteps heading for the kitchen. He got up and wandered into the kitchen and found Joe searching for some food. "Hungry!"

Joe jumped at the sound of Adam's voice. Adam frowned at his brother seeing the terror in his eyes before he looked away. "I didn't mean to scare you little brother." He tried to put his brother at ease but came off sounding condescending.

"I'm not scared!" Joe said indignantly. "You just surprised me is all?" Joe turned and continued looking for something to eat.

"How about I make you some eggs...and while I'm doing that you can cook some bacon." Adam tried to make amends with his brother. The terror he saw in his eyes had him worried. He wanted to help his brother but didn't know how. Times like this they needed their Pa and Adam couldn't help but feel inadequate. He watched Joe cook the bacon and saw him grimace and rub his forehead. "Do you still have a headache?"

"Yes but it's not that bad." Joe moved the bacon to his plate that Adam had put the cooked eggs on.

"You worked hard today little brother. You wore yourself out. Maybe you should take it easy tomorrow, just work around the house."

"Are you saying I can't pull my weight?" Joe was on the defensive.

"No, I'm just saying with that headache that maybe you should not work so hard and let your body recover. You know Joe you're still recovering from that beating. You need to listen to your body sometimes...and it's telling you it's not fully recovered, that's why you have a headache." Adam tried to explain to his brother that he needed to slow down. He also wanted him close to the house so he could keep an eye on him.

Joe considered Adam's words and nodded. "Adam, I'm sorry I lost my temper with you at lunch." Joe wanted to tell his brother how he really felt but was embarrassed and didn't want to appear weak in front of his brother.

Adam could see that his brother wanted to tell him what was troubling him. He showed some rare affection towards his brother, he placed his arm around Joe's shoulders. "What's wrong Joe...apart from worrying about Pa?"

Joe looked at his brother and smiled, "Nothins' wrong Adam...I guess it's like you said...I'm still getting over that beating and I need to listen to my body." Joe couldn't tell his older brother how he really felt. The thought of his brother thinking he was a coward and weak was too humiliating.

Adam squeezed his brother's shoulder, satisfied with his answer and knew he couldn't push his brother too much otherwise he would clam up completely. "I know it's normally Pa you would talk to, but with him laid up, just know I'm here for you little brother if you ever need to talk."

"I know that Adam." Joe told his brother and shyly smiled at his brother's rare showing of affection. He would never reveal his fears to his brother, looking like a weak fool was the last thing he would want to appear as in front of his strong intelligent brother. No he would have to handle this himself and suffer in silence.


	3. Chapter 3

The brothers were sitting around the table eating breakfast, sipping coffee and discussing the day's work assignments. Adam looked at his little brother who seemed to be miles away in thought. "Joe...I'll leave it up to you to do what's needed around the house but no wood chopping...you did more than enough yesterday." Adam told his little brother and waited patiently for a response.

"Ok Adam." The quiet answer made his heart ache for his vibrant younger brother. He wished he knew how to help his brother. He was hoping watching him today would give him the clues he needed to ascertain what was troubling him.

"Hoss...we need to change over the hands who are keeping an eye on the main herd. Put Dan in charge...we can trust him." Adam ate some more breakfast and glanced at his little brother's plate. 'At least he's eating' he thought.

"Why Dan? Why not Len? He's the one with more experience and he's been here a long time." Hoss questioned his older brother.

"I'd prefer Dan and I think the men get on better with him. Len can help with round up in the west section, they need some help there. Travis told me the herd has really strayed because of that cat." Adam told his brother hoping to convince him that they needed to change who was in charge. He hadn't noticed Joe stiffen at the mention of Len's name.

"I'm going to get started." Joe stood and left the table. He went into his father's room and knelt down next to his bed. He thought he looked better, but he was still sleeping a lot. The pain was so bad that the doctor was keeping him sedated. "I need you Pa so much!" He sighed at the silence and squeezed his father's hand before rising and leaving the room. He didn't see the fingers slowly rise in response to his touch.

"Hoss I don't know what it is, but I don't want Len left in charge. I didn't want to say anything in front of Joe but I wasn't impressed with what he had to say yesterday."

"What do you mean Adam? He's been working for Pa for a long time. He's one of our oldest hands." Hoss didn't understand why his brother didn't trust Len. He had no problems with the man; in fact Len had helped Hoss when he was younger. Len was a big man like Hoss and understood how he felt sometimes.

"I'm not sure what I mean myself Hoss...so just for now go along with this...till I sought it out." Adam wanted his brother to trust his instincts.

"Alright Adam...but you know I like Len...he's helped me...you know?" Hoss looked at his brother wanting him to understand how he felt about Len.

"I know Hoss but...he said something about Little Joe yesterday that I didn't like and I just want to be sure before I do anything." Hoss nodded and wondered if Little Joe was treating Len differently like he was with him. He thought maybe Len might know why Joe was acting the way he was around him so he decided to talk to him about it. He didn't know he would be feeding the vindictive man information he would use against his little brother.

Joe prepared his brother's horses and began to clean out the stalls. He cleaned the tack room without the usual grumbling, no one liked the job. He also mended a few broken palings on the corral fence. Adam called him in for lunch. He had been watching his brother and the silent working form was worrying him. He knew something was deeply troubling his brother. Hoss rode in and joined his brothers for lunch.

"Do you mind if I sit and eat with Pa?" Adam and Hoss looked up from their plates surprised with Joe's request. They shrugged and shook their heads. Hoss thought Joe's quietness was because he was worried about his Pa but Adam knew it was more than that.

After lunch, Hoss joined Len and some hands as they rode towards the west pasture. He wanted to talk to him about Little Joe. "Where's that little brother of yours?" He asked before Hoss had a chance to start talking.

"He's working around the house today...did himself in yesterday. Adam wants to keep an eye on him." Hoss considered his next words carefully. "He hasn't been quite himself since that Reagon fella beat him and now with Pa hurt..." Hoss waited for Len to say something but he remained silent. "He's a lot quieter and jumpy, like a spooked horse...especially around me."

Len looked at Hoss, this was new information. "Maybe he's lost his nerve when it comes to big men like us."

Hoss hadn't considered this and wondered if his brother was afraid of him because he was so big. He didn't notice the smile that had spread across Len's face. They arrived at their destination, both deep in thought. Hoss was oblivious to the fact that he had fed the old hand with a piece of information that he would use to hurt his little brother.

The Hands returned late that afternoon, Hoss had gone into town to collect the mail; Len looked around for Little Joe. He was sitting at the end of the front porch sharpening the axe he used the previous day. Len couldn't let the opportunity to taunt the boy go by.

"See you've had an easy day!" Len said jokingly but meaning every word. Adam who was sitting at his Pa's desk heard the remark through the open window to the side of the desk.

"What do you want?" Joe didn't like this man and just wanted to be left alone to do his work. He continued to sharpen the axe ignoring the hand.

"Are you going to use that or are you sharpening it for your brothers to use?"

"What do you mean by that? I chopped the wood yesterday and the kindling the day before...besides it's none of your business what I do." Joe was annoyed with himself; he didn't need to defend his actions to this man.

"You might have your brothers fooled but I can see right through you. You think chopping wood here and there will make them think you're pulling your weight around here but we hands know better." He got close to Joe's face "I'm watching you boy...you're upsetting your brother Hoss and I don't like that. You better start treating him with the respect he deserves. He works ten times harder than you. You'll see the end of this if you don't know what's good for ya!" Len held his fist up close to Joe's face. Normally Joe would have swatted it away and hit the man, but his inner fears surfaced and it was as if he was facing Reagon all over again. He swallowed hard and tried to draw on his failing courage to speak.

"Get your fist away from my face!" Joe told Len but his voice was shaky and didn't have the usual cockiness. Len laughed at him and walked away; making Joe feel like the fool he already believed he was.

Adam sat at the desk and listened. He heard tools being moved and then the footsteps of his little brother. He waited for him to enter the house but he didn't come through the front door. He didn't know that Joe had taken the back way avoiding everyone. He was in his room before Adam had risen to go look for his brother.

Adam was angry with the way Len had spoken to his little brother. No hand on the ranch had the right to question his brother over his work. That was something that only the family had a right to do. He needed to speak to Hoss and ask him about Len's comments and let him know what Len had said to his brother. He knew that Len's comments would have upset Joe, but what he didn't know was that Len had told Joe in another conversation that both his brothers thought he was lazy.

Joe sat on his bed and stared at the wall. It was obvious to him that Hoss had complained about him and it hurt to think that Hoss had done it with Len; undermining what little authority Joe had on the ranch. Most of the hands tolerated him because he was the owner's son, only the younger ones treated him with respect. Some older ones knew him to be a hard worker and treated him well but being older they tended to order him around just like another hand which sometimes got on his nerves. In the future he would try to avoid Len, the man made him nervous and took away what little confidence he had.

Adam met Hoss in the barn. He wanted to talk to him before supper and without being heard by Joe. "Had a nice talk to Len today?"

Hoss looked at his brother a little confused. "What do you mean by that Adam?"

"Len told Joe that he upset you and didn't treat you with the respect you deserved. He also told our little brother that you work ten times harder than him...Sound familiar?" Adam was irritated with his brother for discussing family business with a hand.

Hoss sighed and was surprised that Len had taken it on himself to approach Joe over what he said. "It's the truth aint it?"

"No it's not! Joe works hard and you know he's having a hard time coping with Pa being hurt and that beating he took. You had no right talking to Len about family stuff!" Adam was not going to let his brother use the way Joe was acting towards him as an excuse to undermine Joe with Len.

"Who I talk to is my business Adam, not yours!" Hoss yelled at his older brother. It wasn't often the two brothers argued but Hoss was acting out over Joe's actions towards him. He didn't like his older brother lecturing him.

"While Pa is sick, I'm in charge younger brother and I'm telling you don't discuss our little brother with the hands!" He left the barn not wanting to discuss it any further and went searching for Joe. He didn't realise that he had just made Hoss angry with his younger brother and that it would become one more thing for Joe to have to cope with.

Adam found Joe in his room, having cleaned up for supper. He was sitting by the window reading. "Why don't you read downstairs in Pa's room?" Adam suggested to him. Joe looked up from his book and half smiled.

"I suppose I should, maybe Pa will wake up!" Joe eyes looked longingly at his brother. Adam could see the vulnerability in his eyes. To Adam Joe looked more like sixteen than eighteen. Joe stood and walked with his brother downstairs. Hoss entered the house and stomped past them. Joe looked at Adam, for a second Adam saw fear but it was gone as quickly as it came.

"You go sit with Pa. Don't worry about Hoss; we had words, nothing serious." Adam reassured him.

Joe sat down next to his father and sighed heavily. He felt like his whole world was falling apart. His head was aching and his hands were shaking. He hated feeling this way, but was at a loss as to how to dispel these feelings of fear and uneasiness. He needed his father to hug him and tell him everything will be alright and that his brothers did love and trust him. Instead all he could see was a fist pounding into his face and his brothers laughing at him and scowling at him for not doing his chores. He rubbed his forehead and was soon dozing with his head resting on his father's arm.

"What in tarnation are you doing sleeping on Pa's arm? Some company you turned out to be. All you do is sleep lately." Hoss took his anger with Adam out on Joe.

Joe raised his head and only comprehended half of what Hoss said. He rubbed his eyes and forehead. His headache was making it hard to focus. "Aren't you supposed to be watching Pa not sleeping?"

"I was just keeping him company, that's all. I guess I fell asleep." Joe rubbed his forehead. "I have a headache so don't yell Hoss." Joe said absentmindedly not seeing the anger in his brother's eyes.

"You mind me boy! Supper's ready, now get to the table and leave Pa in peace." Hoss ordered.

Joe rose slowly and saw the anger in his brother's eyes and also heard the anger in his words. He swallowed hard and wondered what he had done to make his brother so angry with him. He nodded his head and walked out of his father's room giving his brother a wide berth.

Supper was eaten in silence and it wasn't long before Joe excused himself, using his headache as an excuse to leave his hardly touched supper and the table to go to bed. He heard Hoss scoff as he walked up the stairs. Joe felt isolated in his room but the isolation brought him some comfort. No-one was shouting at him and no-one was threatening him with their fist. He picked up his mother's picture and felt tears well in his eyes, "When will I stop feeling like this? I wish you were here, I'm so afraid and I don't know why?" Adam was standing outside his brother's room and blinked away the tears that threatened to fall. He wanted to take his little brother and hug him and tell him that everything was going to be alright but his brother was not a six year old, he was a man and he had no idea how to help him.


	4. Chapter 4

Joe woke well before sunrise the next morning. He lay in his bed; his thoughts contemplated everything that had happened over the past few weeks. Knowing that he would not be getting back to sleep, he got out of bed and decided to get an early start on his chores. He collected the eggs for Hop Sing to help him with breakfast. Hop Sing was leaving first thing for Virginia City to help a sick cousin. While he was preparing breakfast, Joe did the barn chores and saddled his and his brother's horses.

He made his way back into the house and Hop Sing ushered him to the table. "This yours...you eat...brother's in oven. I go now and will be back for supper." He told Joe.

"Bye Hop Sing...say hello to your cousin!" Joe called out. When he finished his breakfast he sat in his Pa's room and watched him sleep and concentrated on his breathing. He could hear movement upstairs and waited for his brothers to come downstairs. A knot was forming in his stomach as he thought about Hoss. He had been very angry with him and Joe speculated whether he would be still mad.

Adam was the first of his older brothers to appear. He poured himself a cup of coffee and walked into Pa's room. "How is he?"

"He's sleeping peacefully Adam. I wish he would wake up!" Joe beseeched.

"I know you need him little brother but sleeping is the best thing for him right now." Adam told him and placed a hand on his shoulder trying to give his brother some comfort.

"Hop Sing has already gone Adam. He asked me to tell you and Hoss that breakfast is in the oven." Adam nodded and made his way into the kitchen. Joe saw Hoss follow him. He figured Hoss hadn't seen him in their father's room.

When the brothers came out of the kitchen carrying their plates they sat down at the table. Hoss didn't greet his little brother. The brothers sat at the table and ate in silence. "Please wake up Pa...We need you!" Joe whispered squeezing his eyes shut willing his father to open his eyes. Joe sighed and got up to pour himself a cup of coffee. When he approached the table he looked at Hoss. Hoss kept his head down concentrating on his breakfast. "Good morning Hoss!"

Hoss heard his little brother approach the table and saw his hands pour some coffee. He kept his head down to avoid eye contact with both brothers. Joe greeted him and he forced a grunt out in response. He was still angry with his brothers.

Adam stopped eating when Hoss only grunted at his little brother. He glanced at Joe and saw the hurt in his eyes. He thought this was so unlike Hoss but he was not going to change his mind about Len.

Joe left his brothers eating and sat back in his Pa's room, waiting for Adam to hand out the days tasks. There was a loud bang on the door.

"Adam!..Hoss!...Are you there?" Travis yelled. Adam got up from the table and approached the hand. "There's been a stampede!"

"Is anyone hurt?" Adam asked as he started to put on his gun belt. Hoss joined him and did the same. Joe joined his brothers and went to grab his gun belt but Adam said, "Joe you need to stay here. Someone has to stay with Pa. When Hop Sing gets back come out and join us then."

"Alright Adam...Be careful!" Joe told his brothers.

Adam put his hand on his little brother's thin shoulder. "We will...don't you worry...look after Pa!" They left. When the door shut Joe realised that Hoss had left without speaking to him, the silence of his brother echoed by the silent house. Joe sighed and returned to his father's room.

Len, chuckling at his cleverness, had caused a bigger stampede than he had anticipated. He watched Dan send the young hand Travis to the house to alert the brothers. He waited till he was out of sight before he made his way to the house. He knew with Adam no longer trusting him that his days were numbered so he intended to collect some extra pay to cover his years of employ. The hands were due to be paid so he knew the payroll would have to be in the house. While the brothers were helping with the stampede he would rob the house with only the cook to contend with. He took the long way to the house to avoid running into the brothers.

Adam asked Travis again "Was anyone hurt?"

"Not that I know of Adam but the herd was travelling pretty fast and scattering in all directions. It's gonna take us all day to get them back together." He declared. Adam frowned.

"Do you know what started the stampede?" His suspicious mind was assessing the situation. He was very aware that the payroll was in the safe and didn't like that Travis was unable to tell him what started the stampede. He remembered that he hadn't told Joe about the Doctor's visit later that morning and decided to go back to the house.

"I don't like this. I'm going back to the house to let Joe know about Doc Martins visit this morning and I'm gonna pick up the payroll and pay the hands after we get the herd back together." He turned his horse around and headed back.

Joe was reading Adam's book, and would look over the book every so often checking for any signs of his father waking. He heard the door open and wondered why his brothers were back so soon. After placing the book back on the side table he walked towards the door. He was surprised to see Len standing in the big room drinking in its grandeur.

"Why are you here?" Joe asked, apprehensively. He was aware the payroll was in the safe and had learnt from an early age to be careful on payroll day.

"I've come for what's owed to me." He stated looking at Joe with distaste.

"You'll get paid when the rest of the hands get paid." Joe told him. "Now leave and go and help with the main herd." Joe ordered Len. Len stepped forward and slapped Joe hard in the face causing him to almost fall from the force. He looked at the back of his hand and saw blood.

"Open the safe!" He ordered Joe. Joe shook his head. Len turned and said, "I'll get the combination out of your Pa!" He declared.

Joe ran towards him yelling "Leave him alone!" The fear and apprehension that had been haunting him the past few weeks was replaced with rage. Len swatted him away like a rag doll. Joe jumped up and ran into his father's room.

Len was standing over Ben's sleeping form. He had a knife in his hand. Joe lunged at him putting his body between Len and his Pa. Ben opened his eyes, the yelling and the scuffle in his room disturbing him. To his horror he saw Len raise a knife and plunge it into his youngest son.

Joe felt searing pain in his shoulder. He fell to the floor, his breath momentarily taken away from him. He felt white hot pain as the knife was pulled from his shoulder. He drew on all his strength and rose lunging at Len again. Ben watched his brave son use everything he had to protect him. A dark figure joined the fight.

Adam approached the house and saw a horse tied to the hitching post. He frowned and walked quickly into the house. He heard noises coming from his father's room and ran to the doorway. Joe was fighting with Len, a knife slicing through the air. Adam lunged at Len. The knife came down and Len pushed Adam away. He ran for the door but Adam ran after him.

Len grabbed the first thing he saw and hit Adam in the head with it. When he fell, Len ran out the door and jumped on his horse and rode as fast as he could away from the ranch. He vowed that he would come back and get what he deserved for putting up with the young Cartwright and his father.

Doc Martin rode into the yard. He called out as he walked into the house. He walked further in when there was no answer. A groan caught his attention. Adam was trying to sit up. Doc Martin ran to his side and helped him stand. Adam put his hand on his head and exclaimed "Joe!"

He pushed past the doctor to his father's room. His Pa was looking at the floor where his youngest son lay; blood spreading across the floor.

"Oh dear God!" Doc Martin called and he ran past the staggering figure of Adam. He knelt down and tuned the still body of the youngest Cartwright over. The front of Joe was soaked in blood and a knife was protruding from his side. The doctor felt for a pulse, "He's alive! Adam, help me!" Together they picked up Joe and placed him next to his Pa on the bed.

Doc Martin grabbed towels that were on the table and placed them over the wounds, being careful of the knife. "Adam can you apply the pressure? I need to get some water and some more towels." Adam nodded tentatively, his head spinning and took over from the Doc.

Adam glanced at his father and realised he was awake. He could see the fear in his father's eyes. "He'll be alright Pa!" His father glanced at him, not really believing him. When Doc Martin re-entered the room Adam said, "Pa's awake!" The doctor looked at Ben and tried to give him a reassuring smile but knew that it was useless trying to downplay the seriousness of the situation.

"I'll do all I can for him Ben!" he told his friend.

Doc Martin went to work and it was some time later that he washed his bloody hands and covered the unconscious youngest Cartwright. He then checked Adam who was sitting on the end of the bed. "Will he be alright Paul?"

"Adam, Joe has lost a lot of blood. He's lucky the knife missed his heart and lungs. He will be very sore when he wakes up but that won't be for some time Adam. His body needs time to recover. What happened?"

"One of our hands tried to rob us of the payroll, I'm assuming. When I came home, Joe was fighting him here in Pa's room." Adam told the doctor. He felt sick to his stomach.

"Where is everyone?" Doc Martin asked.

"All the hands are helping with the stampede. Hop Sing is in Virginia City."

Doc Martin checked on Ben, "Are you in a lot of pain Ben?" he asked his long time friend.

"Yes Paul...my legs." Ben told him. "Will Joe be alright?"

Doc Martin patted Ben's shoulder. "He's got a good chance Ben. He's young and strong. Now drink this for the pain." He told his friend. He drank and watched his youngest son's still form. He moved his hand over to Joe's and held his hand. Over the past few weeks, Ben had heard the heart breaking pleas from his son but had been unable to open his eyes because of the sedation. Adam sat next to the bed, his eyes were glassy. He tried to stay awake to watch over his brother and Pa. Doc Martin drove his buggy back to Virginia City to get Hop Sing and alert the sheriff about the Ponderosa hand Len.

In the foothills south of the house Len camped and planned his next move. He cursed the youngest brother for ruining his plans. He hoped that he was still alive because he wanted to make him suffer. He wanted to torture Ben Cartwright for being successful and for loving the boy; when he had not been given anything but abuse from his own father.


	5. Chapter 5

Hop Sing took over from Adam. He promptly sent Adam to bed to recover from the blow he took to his head. Sheriff Roy Coffee sent his deputy out to the main herd of the Ponderosa and told Hoss what had happened back at the house. Hoss was horrified with the news. He felt guilty about the way he had treated his brothers especially his little brother. As he rode back to the house the overwhelming guilt turned into fury. Len, a trusted long time hand, had betrayed him and his family.

He entered the house and called out to Adam. Hop Sing rounded the corner from the dining room shushing him. "You make too much noise!" he admonished him and ushered Hoss into his father's room. He took in the sight of his little brother sleeping peacefully next to his father who was lovingly watching over his youngest son. Tears welled in the big man's eyes; his little brother looked very young and vulnerable. Joe's chest was covered in bandages and his face was pale.

Hoss remembered how he treated his little brother at breakfast. "I'm so sorry little brother...you didn't deserve this and I promise you I'll make Len pay!" he promised Joe.

Ben looked at his gentle son and knew he meant what he said, "Hoss don't do anything foolish...Little Joe wouldn't want that...Let Roy handle it." Ben's voice was croaky from little use over the past few days and his eyes were struggling to stay open; the pain medication taking effect. He squeezed Joe's hand, trying to give his sleeping son the comfort that he had begged for whilst his Pa slept under sedation. He had heard his son sadly telling him how Hoss had been mad at him and that he didn't know why.

Ben struggled to talk to Hoss, knowing the guilt that would be eating up the man. He couldn't force the words out, his mouth not co-operating, the medication numbing his mouth. Just as he had been unable to communicate with Joe he was now failing Hoss. His eyelids closed trapping his thoughts behind the lead weights. He held onto his son's hand, his only link to his family.

Len moved further into the hills, keeping to the rocky areas to avoid the posse. He escaped the extreme weather conditions by taking refuge in some of the hidden caves. All the time he vowed his revenge on the oldest and youngest Cartwright.

A bed was set up in the downstairs bedroom for convenience. Hoss transferred Joe to the bed, making it easier for Hop Sing to keep an eye on both Cartwrights. Adam took a couple days to recover from the bang on the head and made peace with Hoss. He understood Hoss's reluctance to think badly of Len.

Hoss's opinion of Len had changed dramatically after seeing his little brother. He joined up with the posse the second day but mostly searched alone. He wanted to confront Len and get some answers from him before turning him over to the sheriff. He couldn't understand how the man could be so understanding of his problems and hate his little brother so much.

Joe had developed a fever and Doc Martin was called out to the house. He had to flush out the wound in Joe's side and restitch it. Three days after the attack Joe's fever broke and Joe finally fell into a deep healing sleep. It was another nine hours before he started to wake. Adam was sitting in the room when Joe's eyes fluttered open.

"Joe!...Can you hear me?" Adam called to his brother trying to get him to wake up.

Joe looked at his older brother, frowning, not knowing where he was. The pain in his shoulder and side was overwhelming, so he lay still hoping the sharpness of the pain would subside. He looked at his brother's concerned eyes and tried to give him a reassuring smile. It turned into more like a grimace. Adam gave Joe something to drink to help with the pain. He looked at Adam as if just recalling something. His panic filled eyes searched the room, "Pa!"

"He's alright Joe...You stopped Len from hurting him." Adam told his brother, smiling and displaying admiration for his brother.

"He wanted the payroll Adam! Said we owed him...He was going to hurt Pa to get the combination to the safe." Joe told his brother.

Adam stepped to the side and said, "Look for yourself Joe...He's fine and he's getting stronger every day." Adam told his little brother. After satisfying his concerns for his Pa, Joe allowed the medicine that his brother had given him, to pull his painful body into a deep slumber.

Len was biding his time up in the foothills. He knew the ranch's routine and that round up was about to start. This was one of the busiest times of the year for the ranch and would mean during the day that all of the hands and the brothers would be away from the house. He would get his satisfaction then. He made his way down the unused overgrown trail to observe the house and get a clearer picture on the condition of the youngest brother.

Hoss and Adam organised the roundup. They were reluctant to leave the house, while Len was still at large, but too much needed to be done. Roy had told them that Len was probably long gone but Adam still had the uneasy feeling that Len was waiting for another opportunity. The viciousness of his attack and the reasons behind him wanting to rob them didn't sound like a man who would easily give up, thought Adam. He wished they had enough hands to be able to keep someone back to guard the house but with the booming mines around Virginia City hiring had become harder.

Joe was making steady progress; he was able to sit up with help in bed. This made eating a lot easier, not that he had much of an appetite. Pa was also getting better with Doc Martin cutting back his doses of pain medicine. He was awake for longer periods but had yet been able to time one of those periods when Joe was awake. Adam knew that his father desperately wanted to talk to Joe, having told Adam of his brother's pleas for help whilst he was sedated. Although Adam knew of Joe's anguish it still hurt him deeply hearing it from his father and knowing he was unable to bring the much needed comfort to his brother.

"Do you think his nervousness around Hoss and big men like Len is gone...seeing he fought Len without hesitation?" Adam asked his father, glancing at his brothers sleeping form in the other bed.

"I think your brother's courage overcame those fears...not having time to think and acting on instinct...I just wish I could talk to him..." Ben also looked over at his sleeping son.

"You will Pa...There'll be plenty of time for that, while you're both recuperating." Adam told his father. He could see the longing in his father's eyes to hold Joe in his arms.

"Are they any closer to finding Len?" Ben asked with concern.

"No...Roy and the posse have searched everywhere...He thinks he's long gone." Adam said without looking at his father, not wanting to give away his true feelings on the matter. He didn't want to worry his father.

"You think his still out there don't you?" Adam smiled at his father. He knew him too well to hide his feelings.

"Yes I do. I think he wanted more than just the money. Did you know he hated Joe...He told Joe that me and Hoss just put up with him cause he was our brother, that we really thought he was lazy and didn't pull his weight around the ranch? Joe almost worked himself to death trying to show us that he was a hard worker and we had no idea that he was feeling that way. It wasn't till I spoke with Len that I got a hint of his malice towards Joe and then I overheard him taunting Joe...When I told Hoss, it made things worse."

"Adam, it's hard for Hoss not to like the man. He's helped Hoss cope with being the size he is since he was sixteen, that's the only reason I kept him on. To be honest I've never really liked the man but he has helped Hoss." Ben told his son trying to help him understand his younger brother's feelings. "How is Hoss coping with all of this Adam? He just sits quietly with Joe not saying anything just watching his little brother sleep."

"Different hands have told me that he helps out with the herd for while then he goes off searching for Len. I've tried to talk to him about it but I think his holding all this guilt inside of him. He ignored Joe the morning of the attack and I think its eating away at him." Adam told his father.

"I need to talk to him. When he gets back, I'll talk to him." Adam gladly handed over the parenting responsibilities to his father. He found it hard to deal with the emotional side of things especially with his younger brother. A gasp brought him out of his thoughts. Adam quickly went to his brother's bedside.

He spoke softly to Joe, "You alright? You need me to help you?"

"I'm alright Adam. I just moved wrong...my side..." Joe grimaced and beads of sweat broke out on his forehead from the pain.

"Easy...Let me help you!" Adam placed his arms under Joe's back and helped him move into a more comfortable position. Joe's eyes closed and soon his breathing was slow and steady. Adam smiled at his brother and thought he looked so young when he was sleeping. He used a cloth to wipe the sweat from his forehead and could almost see his brother's face relax with contentment, in his sleep.

"Is he alright?" Ben asked not believing his youngest son's claims.

Adam heard the worry in his father's voice. "He's alright Pa...The wound in his side was deep...he just has to be careful how he moves and not put any strain on it." Adam sat back down next to his father. "He must have moved in his sleep...he still looked half asleep." Adam told his father trying to ease his anxiety. "He will be alright Pa...It will just take time...You know Joe, before we know it we'll have to tie him to the bed to keep him still."

Ben snorted, remembering past injuries and illnesses and trying to keep his son still. His eyes were getting heavy. "Get some sleep Pa." Adam told him and his father allowed his eyes to close. He was sleeping comfortably within seconds. Adam rose from the chair and checked on Joe. He wiped more sweat from his brother's forehead and frowned. His brother felt hot and he could hear a slight wheeze in his breathing. Adam asked Hop Sing to get one of the hands to go into town and get Doc Martin.

Len sat silently observing from an outcrop of rocks. He watched the doctor's buggy pull up in front of the house and he wondered if it was for the father or son. He toyed with thoughts of Joe dying and a smile spread across his face, hoping that the boy was suffering. His smile faltered when he thought that the father may not be aware of it, wanting him to suffer the anguish of a dying son, especially Joe. He needed to act soon, his thirst for punishing the father and son consuming him, after years of watching the love and comforts bestowed on the boy. No-one should be that happy not after the way I suffered at the hands of my father, he contemplated. He sat and waited patiently for his chance to carry out his plans.


	6. Chapter 6

When Hoss got back from helping with the roundup he went straight to his father's room. He had seen the Doc's buggy and was worried that Joe had taken a turn for the worse. He found his father sleeping peacefully, but also alone, Joe's makeshift bed empty. Hop Sing entered the room and saw Hoss looking around frowning at his findings.

"Little Joe has been moved to own bed. Very sick, with cold. Not want to give to father." Hop Sing told the middle son in his broken English. "You go see for self!" He told Hoss. Hoss nodded and walked up the stairs with trepidation. Joe never got colds, 'Why now?' he thought.

He entered his little brother's room and the first thing that assaulted his ears was the wheezing. Joe was propped up on pillows, he appeared to be sleeping. He had the flush of a fever and was struggling with his breathing. Every couple of breaths he coughed a deep harsh wet cough. Doc Martin was the first to notice Hoss and said, "He has the beginnings of a chest infection. We didn't want Ben to be exposed to it so we moved Joe to his room. We need to set up some kettles and start steaming the room to help Joe with his breathing," the doctor instructed. They all worked together and soon Joe was sleeping a little more peacefully.

Hoss entered the room later in the evening."You go have supper Adam. I'll look after Joe." Hoss told his brother who was looking tired from the worry over his little brother.

"Thanks Hoss." Adam left without argument, understanding that his brother needed to spend time with Joe and he really needed to have something to eat having missed lunch. Adam left the room knowing that Hoss needed to be with and care for his beloved little brother.

Hoss sat quietly next to his brother, his uncharacteristic anger with his younger brother in the morning had gone. He was now consumed with guilt. He had talked with his father earlier, when Ben had woken up. Ben explained to him how Joe's fears from the beating had his little brother behaving the way he was with him because Joe was unable to get the images of Reagon's fists from his mind. Hoss was mortified with his own behaviour towards his suffering brother.

Regrets can weigh a man down and Hoss was more than regretting, he was ashamed of his behaviour over the last twenty-four hours. His little brother had not only needed his understanding but had needed the comfort that he had received many times since he was a tiny child from his big brother. Hoss was angry with himself for not being a good brother or friend to Joe. He sat patiently with his brother, and used a cloth to cool Joe's forehead where beads of sweat sprung like buds from seeds. Joe mumbled in his sleep and tossed his head restlessly.

Joe finally opened his eyes; they were glassy and bright with fever. As he looked up, he found himself looking into the concerned blue eyes of his brother. Joe had been harboring guilt over the way he avoided and ignored his brother after the beating. 'The beating!' he thought, it had started a chain of events. "Hoss?" Joe's voice was hoarse from the coughing.

"It's about time you woke up little brother! You've got a good fever going." Hoss wiped away the persistent beads of sweat.

"Hoss...I'm sorry." Joe could see and hear in his big brother's voice, the guilt, and knew he needed to make peace with him. The close bond they shared needed to be healed in a way only best friend and brother could.

Understanding Joe's expression Hoss put up his hand to stop his little brother from saying any more. "Joe, you couldn't help the way you acted, especially around me. I should have been there for you and I should have been more understanding." Joe could see tears pooling in his lovable brother's eyes. The big man could show such tenderness, and Joe's heart was breaking for the big man.

"No Hoss! I should have told you how I felt...but...I was ashamed with myself for feeling so...so...afraid..." Joe looked up at his brother; he too had tears in his eyes. "I'm a coward Hoss!" Joe declared miserably. He finally said the truth and felt a sense of relief for finally having confessed it to his brother.

Hoss shook his head. "Think again little brother...You're no coward!...You saved Pa's life!...You put yourself between him and Len." Hoss said with conviction. "No Little Joe!...You're no coward!" Hoss looked at Joe directly in the eyes as he made his claims.

Joe saw the love and admiration in his brother's eyes and knew they were back in tune with each other.

"Pa explained a few things to me...I'm sorry I got mad with you about Len. When Adam said he wasn't happy with Len...I was angry!"

"So it's big brother's fault!" Joe said smirking. He coughed and grimaced as his side protested with the sudden movement.

"Easy little brother...dadburnit! You need to lie still...You'll have big brother in here angry with both of us if you're not careful."

Adam had been standing just outside the room listening to his younger brothers' banter. When he stepped into the room, his outer appearance was stern but inside his heart was joyful, pleased about his brothers' reconciliation. "What's this about blaming big brother?" Adam asked seriously but spoiled it with a small smile that he couldn't hold back.

Len had spent an uncomfortable night amongst boulders above the ranch house. He watched the two older Cartwright brothers leave and waited another hour just to make sure no one returned like the last time he tried to rob the house. Len crept into the house and listened for movement, he wanted to know where the cook was, before making his presence known. The sound of coughing drifted down the stairs and then the clatter of pans came from his left. He knew that the cook was in the kitchen and began to creep along the wall.

Hop Sing didn't know what hit him. He had his back to the doorway that led to the dining room. He was stirring some soup on the stove for Little Joe. Len hit him on the back of the head knocking the Chinese cook out. Len smelt the soup and decided to take the time to eat some; it was too inviting after having lived off beans for the past few days.

Len tied the cook up and made his way lazily out of the kitchen, not caring how much time he was taking. He was mindful of the room opposite the dining room. He peeked into the room and found the oldest Cartwright still sleeping. He left the room and made his way up the stairs. He heard more coughing and froze. He listened intensely, trying to get an idea where it was coming from. A room with its door half ajar to his right was the source of the coughing.

Joe coughed causing his side to scream out with pain. He tried to stifle the next cough but the action made the cough burst out with more force from his mouth, as if punishing him for not letting it free straight away. He felt miserable; the chest infection had developed into a head cold as well. Breathing through his nose was impossible and breathing through his mouth made him cough, causing not only his chest to hurt but also his side. It had felt a bit better when he first woke up but now it was sending stabbing pain through his body.

Hop Sing had set up steaming pots of water to help his breathing and Hoss had dropped fresh pine needles into the boiling water. His room was filled with steam and the aroma of pines. It was pleasant, but, its purpose was to loosen Joe's chest. It was doing its job and causing Joe to cough up a lot of the congestion. Joe took the pain without complaint knowing the coughing would subside quicker and he would feel a lot better for it and maybe even sleep for more than an hour at a time. He had had a broken sleep, coughing and almost choking waking him constantly throughout the night.

Joe chuckled to himself remembering Hoss proudly setting up the pine branches in his room and waving a branch under Joe's nose. He questioned what Hoss was trying to do and when Hoss asked him 'Can't you smell that?' Joes answer was NO! It made the big man look like a kicked, sad puppy. When he told his brother that his nose was so stuffy that he wouldn't be able to smell a skunk if one jumped into his room, Hoss laughed his hearty laugh. He told Joe that the pine would soon clear his head. Adam who had heard the exchange added, 'That would be a change. Our little brother, with a clear head on his shoulders!' The three brothers laughed together for the first time in many weeks and it felt good.

Len, with an evil leer, slowly walked into Joe's bedroom. He came face to face with the subject of his most evil thoughts. Joe had been expecting Hop Sing and was confused to see Len standing in his room. It didn't register at first that this man was here to harm him until he was able to clear his muddled thoughts.

"Get up and get dressed!" Len ordered Joe, waving his gun at him. Joe wasn't sure he'd be able to stand let alone get dressed but he knew that he had to try. He was worried that Len would hurt his Pa if he didn't obey. He pulled back the covers and sat up on the side of the bed slowly. Dizziness washed over him. He grabbed some pants from a nearby chair. His movements were slow and he found himself coughing and swaying from the dizziness. He tried to stand up to pull his pants all the way up but the movement caused intense pain in his side and he lost his tenuous balance. Len looked on in frustration and disgust. He realised at that moment that he hadn't thought this plan through thoroughly enough, having not anticipated Joe's immobilization.

Len placed his gun against Joe's temple and pulled him up by the arm. The motion sent Joe spiralling into blackness. Len finished dressing Joe and dragged him downstairs not caring if he caused further injury. He tied up Joe's hands and went back upstairs searching for money. He found some in Hoss's room and he took a silver rifle from Adam's room. Joe was coming to when Len made his way back down the stairs. Len needed the combination for the safe. He knew there wouldn't be the cash that he wanted from his last attempt to rob the Cartwrights but knew that there had to be some cash in the safe.

Len went into the kitchen and grabbed some water. He threw it onto Joe, startling him. Joe groaned and coughed harshly, finding it hard to catch his breath. "Wake up Cartwright!" Len yelled kicking the helpless son in the side to arouse him.

Joe looked at his tormentor with distaste and tried to keep his head still, dizziness threatening to pull him back into unconsciousness. He had been afraid of this man but now having come to terms with his fears and talking to his brothers, had the courage to stare at this man with contempt. Len didn't like Joe's change in demeanour and pulled him over to the safe by his hair, showing the youngest Cartwright who was in control. "I want the combination to the safe!" Len demanded, kicking Joe in his side that was heavily bandaged.

Joe arched his back; the pain brought unwanted tears to his eyes. He was unable to talk for the searing pain. Breathing was almost impossible as the room seemed to shrink to a pinpoint. He mouthed his brother's name 'Hoss' before everything disappeared from sight and awareness left his body. He pictured his family in his mind and said goodbye to them before losing his precarious grip with the world.


	7. Chapter 7

Len looked down at the unmoving body of the youngest Cartwright. He hated the boy and everything he represented. His own direful life had caused this man to look on and allow hatred to fester in his very soul. Joe Cartwright was everything and had everything that he didn't have growing up and he hated him for it. He had taken the middle son under his wing and had helped him cope with the difficulties that came with his large size but all the time had continued to watch and hate the youngest Cartwright. He was the complete opposite to his brother but had a close bond with his brother that Len didn't understand and was jealous of. He had tried to cause a rift between the two brothers but was unsuccessful; their bond was too strong. This just made Len hate the youngest Cartwright even more.

Len was so possessed with hatred that his grip on reality had disappeared. Time had no meaning as he continued to search the house for anything useful to take with him. Ammunition, another rifle, food and some of Hoss's clothes were gathered by Len. Every time he walked down the stairs, the safe called out to him. He needed to open the safe to satisfy his greed. The oldest Cartwright was his only hope now so he decided to reverse the roles; instead of the youngest fearing he'd hurt his father for the combination, he would threaten to hurt the youngest in front of the father and get the combination from him.

He dragged Joe into Ben's room. He was awake and was horrified to see his son treated so badly. Len looked at the owner of the Ponderosa and laughed. "I know you never really liked me...that you only kept me on cause I helped Hoss. I've watched you give this...this kid everything he ever wanted and more..." Len kicked Joe with such force that his body moved across the floor. Ben gasped at the action.

"What do you want?" Ben asked and could barely keep the venomous tone out of his voice, not wanting to be the cause of anymore harm towards his son.

"I want what's owed to me...for putting up with your son and YOU!...I want money and one other thing but that can wait. How much money is in the safe?"

"I couldn't tell you. My son Adam has been looking after that side of things. The combination is 3,3,7." Ben told Len hoping he would leave Little Joe alone and take what's in the safe.

Len grabbed Joe by the hair and dragged him out of the room. Ben looked on horrified to see his son treated this way, especially when he was still recovering from his injuries. He could see blood showing through the bandages on his side and knew that the wound had opened up. Ben yelled, "You've got what you want, leave my son alone!" Len laughed at the father taking great pleasure in taunting him.

Ben looked around the room and tried to think of a way to get out of the bed. 'Then what?' he thought, he was helpless. His despair heightened when he heard his youngest son scream and the taunting laugh of Len. Ben prayed that his son would forgive him for not protecting him. Tears pooled in his eyes but he blinked them away. He has to be strong for his son and not allow him to see him wallowing in despair. He threw the covers of his bed back and rolled off the bed as quietly and carefully as he could.

Len opened the safe and only found two hundred dollars in it. He pulled Joe up by his hair, lifting him off his feet to bring him level to his face. Joe opened his eyes and saw anger and animosity looking back at him. He tried to not show any fear and his defiance earned him a knee to his stomach. Joe cried out as he was dropped to the floor. His body shook and he was finding it hard to breathe.

Len dragged Joe back to Ben's room. He halted abruptly when he entered the room. The bed was empty and the oldest Cartwright was nowhere to be seen. He continued to drag Joe across the floor and dropped him parallel to the bed. Joe was panting, each breath causing searing pain through his body. He turned his head towards the bed. Two chocolate brown eyes looked back at him. Joe thought he was hallucinating but his father smiled at him and brought his fingers up to his mouth telling Joe to keep quiet.

Len checked the kitchen but only Hop Sing was in there, still tied up on the floor. Len didn't acknowledge him, stepping over him like he was nothing. He then went out the side door and scanned the yard. 'How far can a cripple get?' he asked himself. Giving up on looking for the father he made a decision, he had wasted too much time looking for the father, he would punish him by taking his son.

He went back into the main room and grabbed everything he had stolen from the Cartwrights. He put them on his horse and went into the barn to saddle another horse.

Ben reached for his son's hand and told him to hide. Joe was reluctant to leave his father but understood his reasons for wanting him to hide. Hiding would delay Len further and hopefully long enough to get caught by Hoss or Adam. Both brothers were due back for lunch.

Joe tried to rise but the movement was too painful. All the blood from his face drained until he was as white as a ghost. His head spun and the room started to shrink. "I can't Pa...I'm sorry..." Joe's eyes rolled back, showing only the whites of his eyes. Ben grabbed his son and dragged him under the bed. He heard the front door open and hoped that Len had left but he heard it open again.

Ben looked back to where his son had been laying and saw a pool of blood. There was also a trail of blood leading to under the bed. After manoeuvring himself around Joe he pulled a blanket from the bed and used it to wipe away the trail of blood. He could hear footsteps and the front door being open again. He hurried his actions and wiped away all traces of the trail of blood. He then rolled back under the bed. He positioned himself closest to the end of the bed by pushing Joe further under. He roughly folded the blanket and held it against his son's side.

Joe groaned as pain assaulted his senses. He heard the soothing voice of his father in his ear. Joe tried to open his eyes but was only able to lift his eyelids slightly. He could see his father's face, but couldn't understand why they were surrounded by darkness. Ben could see confusion on his son's face.

"You're under the bed with me son." Ben whispered in Joe's ear. "Try to be quiet Son." Joe nodded and let his eyes slowly close. Being this close to his father gave him the strength to withstand the pain that radiated through his body. He held onto his father's hand tightly, not caring if he appeared scared. He just wanted it all to end; his body was hurting so much. He needed to cough but knew that would give away their hiding place. He lifted his hand and held it tightly across his mouth and coughed, almost choking, but was able to keep the sound of the cough within the confines of under the bed. Ben lifted some of the blanket and put it in Joe's hand to hold over his mouth. This allowed him cough harder, the sound absorbed by the blanket. Unfortunately it left blood on his face. The contrast of the blood on his pale face was ghostly.

Len walked back into the room and saw that nothing but a pool of blood remained where he had left the youngest Cartwright. He yelled animating his frustration, "Cartwright! When I get my hands on you...you'll be one sorry..." Len stopped abruptly because he heard a horse. He quickly ran into the kitchen and peeked through the side door by opening it slightly.

Hoss rode into the yard and sniffed the air, trying to discover what was cooking for lunch. He frowned when no tantalizing aromas met his nose. He paid more attention to the horses that were tied to the hitching posts.

Hoss could see Adams new rifle on one of the horses. Looking closer, he could also see that Joe's saddle was on one of the ranch's work horses. Rope had been tied to one of the stirrups. Hoss wasn't sure what to do next. He was worried he was being watched so he refrained from going for his gun. He decided to casually head towards the barn. He would make his way around the back of the house and hopefully take the intruder by surprise.

Len watched Hoss head for the barn. When Hoss disappeared inside, he carefully opened the side door and slowly made his way over to the barn. When he peered in he couldn't see Hoss anywhere. He swore under his breath. "Where do these Cartwright's keep disappearing?" Len whispered. Frustration was making his anger boil to the surface. He searched the barn and came up empty. He knew that he should leave but common sense did not prevail. He walked back towards the house to search for the youngest Cartwright. Torturing Ben by taking his youngest son was his priority. His hatred for Joe blinding his ability to see that staying was risking him getting caught and the fact that Hoss was somewhere didn't stop his actions either.

Len re-entered the house and looked around the room. It's magnificence made his jealousy worse. Seeing Joe sitting in the room comfortably in his mind made him growl out his frustrations. 'Where could that kid be?' he thought and then something suddenly occurred to him. He ran back into Ben's room and looked at the blood on the floor. There should be a blood trail he thought to himself and searched the floor for evidence of blood. When he was unable to find even a drop of blood he wanted to yell at the top of his voice his frustrations, but knew that would alert Hoss. Len's malicious smile spread across his face when he heard the sound of creaking floor boards.


	8. Chapter 8

Len stood frozen and listened closely to the sound that had alerted him that he was no longer alone in the room. The same sound was heard again and Len looked at the bed suspiciously. He realized how stupid he had been. They were hiding under the bed and he hadn't even checked under there. 'Like two little girlies.' he thought. He walked slowly over to the bed and circled around to the opposite side of the bed. He knelt down and aimed his gun under the bed. Two sets of eyes looked his way and his malicious smile caused those eyes to reflect fear. Len reached under and grabbed Joe. He dragged him out from under the bed, causing him to cry out; the movement sending pain through his body.

Joe was at the end of his tether. He didn't have the strength to suppress his outcries. Everything protested, as his body shook violently and he coughed until he found himself throwing up. He almost choked as Len prevented him from turning on his side, Len's knee pushing down on his chest making the spasms more painful. At that very moment Joe wished he was dead, but because his father was lying only a few feet from him made the thought disappear as quickly as it came. He drew strength from his father's presence and brought his knee up and used it to push Len off him.

Joe had caught Len by surprise with his movement and he lost his balance for a few seconds. That was all Joe needed and he then brought both legs up and kicked Len in the chest forcing him away from him. Joe's side was consumed with so much pain that it had a numbing effect on him. It couldn't hurt any more than it was at that very moment so he continued to fight with all his might. His guttural instinct was to protect his father.

Len dropped the gun as Joe pushed him backwards with both his feet. The youngest Cartwright had caught him off balance and he cursed him for being so resilient. The power of superiority and size no longer reduced the boy to a cowering adversary. He searched the floor for the gun but was unable to find it. He jumped to his feet and stepped back away from Joe to regain his composure. He quickly stepped out of the path of Joe's wildly swinging legs. He scanned the floor for the gun.

"Hold it!" Hoss stood in the doorway pointing his gun at a man he had regarded as a mentor and friend.

Len looked at Hoss and realised he had made a huge error. He had forgotten about the middle Cartwright and had given him time to sneak up on him. He continued to look down trying to locate his gun. He finally caught a glimpse of it to his right and stepped towards it. "Hoss...you couldn't shoot me...it's me Len your friend...After everything I did for you...How could you shoot me?" Len made his way towards the gun as he spoke, drawing Hoss's attention away from his movements. Hoss was shaking his head. Len saw in Hoss's eyes disgust and anger. "Don't tell me you care about this sorry piece of..."

"Don't say it Len. That's my little brother you're talking about and he's got more courage and integrity than you'll ever have. I oughta break your neck!" Hoss was trying to control his anger to keep his composure. His priority was to get Len away from his brother. "Move out...out of this room!" Hoss ordered. He would take care of this man away from his family's eyes.

Len was standing next to the gun. He just needed to bend down and pick it up. "Hoss, aren't you going to check on your brother first? He's bleeding pretty badly."

Hoss looked away for the second and that was all Len needed. Joe had been listening and watching Len's movement. It wasn't until the last moment that he saw the gun next to Len's foot. As Len knelt down to pick up the gun Joe yelled "Look out!" Shots were fired.

Silence engulfed the room and it was as if time stood still for a few seconds. Sunlight from the window streamed through the drifting gun smoke. The only sound breaking the surreal atmosphere was someone trying to draw in breaths.

Ben listened and watched in horror as the guns were fired not knowing if one of his sons were shot. He pushed his body towards his youngest son. When he emerged from under the bed he saw the dead eyes of Len looking back at him across his son's prone body. Running footsteps could be heard and Ben looked towards the doorway and saw his eldest son cautiously entering the room with gun drawn.

Adam entered his father's room and was horrified to see the carnage. Hoss stood frozen to the spot staring. Adam followed his line of vision and gasped. "Hoss...go get the doctor!" Adam yelled as he ran to his little brother's side. Joe was choking and his upper body was covered in blood. Ben was leaning over him pressing down on a wound. Adam turned Joe onto his side and ran to the other side of the bed. He grabbed towels to cover the wound. Hoss was still standing frozen. Adam grabbed his arms and shook him. "Hoss! Joe needs a doctor!" Adam let go of his brother as he came out of his stupor.

Hoss blinked and realized Adam was yelling at him. "It's my fault...I wasn't fast enough!" Hoss told his brother.

"He needs you to get the doctor Hoss...Go!" Adam tried to make his brother understand the urgency of his task. Hoss nodded and left the room. Adam sighed with relief that his brother finally understood him. He ran to his younger brother's side and knelt down. "Here Pa...Use this." Adam handed his father a towel. Joe was bleeding from two wounds. His side had opened up and he had a bullet wound in his shoulder.

"Check on Hop Sing Adam!" Ben instructed his son.

Adam reluctantly left the room and went to the kitchen. He found Hop Sing lying on the floor. He quickly untied him. "Are you alright?" Adam asked him with concern.

"Hop Sing have bad headache but will be alright. Father and brother more important." Hop Sing looked at Adam expectantly.

"Pa's ok...Joe's been shot and his side is bleeding again." Adam told him. Hop Sing got to work straight away, putting pots of water on the stove and grabbed some clean bandages from a cupboard.

"You help father and brother; I get things ready for doctor." Hop Sing told Adam.

Adam ran back into his father's room. Ben was talking softly to his son. Adam knelt down and saw that Joe had his eyes partly opened. He wasn't sure if he was fully conscious but he could see that his brother was staring intensely at his father. Adam straightened the bed and knelt down. "Let's make you more comfortable little brother." He lifted his brother with ease and noted how much weight his brother had lost over the past weeks. Joe whimpered when Adam lifted him and tears escaped from the corners of his eyes. Joe tried to turn his head not wanting his big brother to see his weakness but Adam, after placing him on the bed, turned his head back to face him. He smiled at his brother.

"I'm proud of you Joe...don't ever forget that little brother." Joe lost all his resolve and cried in his brothers arms. Everything had caught up to him and he no longer wanted to be brave and strong. He just wanted his brother's comfort and love. "It's going to be alright Joe...ssshhh..." Adam's deep bond with his brother made him hold his brother tightly. He had done this many times when he was a small child and the moment drew him back to the times when Joe worshipped his brother and never questioned him.

"I need to help Pa Joe." Adam laid Joe back on the bed. Joe watched his brother and Hop Sing pick up his father and laid him on the bed next to him. Adam checked Joe's wounds and started to wash away the tears and blood from his face.

"The bloods from the blanket...Joe tried to cover his mouth with it to stop Len from hearing him cough." Ben told Adam. "He fought Len despite his wounds Adam. You should have seen him." Ben looked lovingly at his youngest son.

"Did Len say why?" Adam left the question hanging; meaning why hurt Joe, why rob them.

Ben closed his eyes as he remembered. "I think he was jealous of our lives and especially of Joe's...I don't think he had a very good childhood and somehow in his mind hated Joe for having the opposite to his." Ben shook his head. "I don't think we'll ever really know why?" Ben told his oldest son. "Maybe Joe can tell us more when he's up to it."

Joe was very pale and had his eyes shut. He listened to Adam and Ben but was unable to join in on the conversation. His chest hurt and he concentrated on his breathing. He drifted off to sleep but was woken suddenly. He was choking. He felt his shoulders being raised and it brought him relief. He coughed and was soon able to draw in breaths to his air starved lungs. He opened his eyes and saw his brother and father looking at him with concern. "I'm sorry." He whispered, his voice gone.

"There's nothing to be sorry about little brother." Adam told him frowning. He didn't want Joe to fall back into his melancholy mood. "You've got a chest infection. You need to cough. We should have had you sitting up." Adam explained taking the blame for his brother's coughing spasm.

Joe smiled weakly at his brother and felt his father's hand on his face. He turned his head to his father. He saw nothing but unconditional love in his eyes. Joe reached up and held his father's hand. The closeness to his father gave him the strength to hold on and battle through the pain and coughing.

When Doc Martin finally arrived, he had Ben moved to his own room. Again, he was worried that Ben might catch Joe's cold and knew that the older man may not have the strength to fight it. He removed the bullet from Joe's shoulder and stitched up his side. While he was still unconscious, Adam and Hoss moved Joe to his room. The pots of boiling water and pine needles were set up and the brothers continued to help their little brother fight the chest infection. Doc Martin was worried that the trauma Joe had suffered would make it hard for his body to fight off the chest infection and that it would turn into pneumonia.

"If that happens...it would surely kill him." He told Hoss and Adam.

Joe fought hard and listened to his brother's coach him to breathe and to cough up the congestion. Seven gruelling, frightening days later Joe finally turned the corner and started to recover. The doctor smiled and told Adam and Hoss that he was out of danger and was going to be ok. The brothers sighed with relief and quickly let their father know. They could see tears of joy pool in their father's eyes. Hoss wiped his eyes not caring to hide his emotions. Adam would let the tears fall in the privacy of his room.

Joe had a long road of recovery, from his wounds and sickness. After three months of remaining in the house, a very thin and pale man emerged from the house. His movements were slow and deliberate. He slowly strolled across the yard to the corral. He clicked his tongue, an excited Cochise walked over bobbing her head up and down towards her master. She rubbed her head on his shoulder. Joe held an apple out and she joyfully munched on it. A hand rubbed his shoulder and he looked up into his brother's blue eyes.

"That horse has been pining for you...She's been off her feed...wandering around the corral with her head down...Now look at her!" Hoss told his brother. Joe and Hoss had talked through everything and had come to the understanding that Len had simply been jealous of their close relationship and loving family. Len had told Hoss about his abusive father some time back. The brothers were grateful of their own loving family but didn't excuse Len for his actions, just understood them. Their father had also helped them both come to terms with everything that had happened.

"Time for supper...You need to eat boy...you're too puny...If you want to ride that horse you'll need to fatten up." Hoss told his little brother. Joe put his arm around his big brother and laughed.

"Bit hard with you at the same table brother!" He exclaimed.

"What was that...come here?" Hoss tried to swat his brother but Joe ducked away from him. He walked into the house and immediately stood behind his older brother, using him as a shield. Adam shook his head at the antics of his brothers but secretly loved it. They were whole again.

Ben, sitting in his chair in front of the fire, smiled lovingly at his sons. Everything was as it should be.


End file.
